Let's take a little trip back to a religious parody series I started a while ago, and I'd like to continue it now, not with any of the things I said I was going to do, but with the four horsemen of the apocalypse. I've tried to parallel them as closely as possible to the prophecy given in Revelation, from the color of the horses to the form and means of destruction represented by each rider. Anyway, these may sound all too familiar, and you can probably guess them now without reading, but here are the four riders who shall bring war, famine, pestilence, and death to our happy little existence:
The first rider, upon a white horse, bearing a bow and wearing a crown of thorns, shall be the Christ, Lord of Loathing and King of Thieves. He represents religion, ignorance, and false hope, and shall cause destruction through hatred and conquest from within the nations with the false lure of righteousness.
The second horseman shall ride a beast the deep red color of freshly spilt blood and shall wield a sword. He represents governments and the flawed establishments of state power. He brings destruction through warfare and conquest between the nations.
The third horse is black, and the rider bears the scales. He represents the famines and death that accompany a currencied economy. Inflation, greed, and inequality are the results of his skewed fiscal justice.
The fourth rider, whose horse is pale and sickly, represents the death and weakness brought by medical science and technology. His works upon the earth are the most evil and the most destructive, for they are the root of all others. Not only is the weakened gene pool that medicine brings inevitable, but the interdependence created by improved science and technology, is the father of society, and is therefore the father of society's three great evils - religion, government, and economy.
I don't know if that made any sense, but it's late and I'm pissed, and I felt like taking it out on religion instead of the boredom and bitter nostalgic regret I get every time I set foot in this house. I may be a welcome guest, but I cannot welcome the sight of this house anymore. The geologic layers of filth around here have formed a monument to my mediocrity and laziness. There are parts of this house that haven't been touched in half a decade, and I'm not the boy I was then. I need to get out of this museum and back to my home.
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